Bottles leave bitter memories

By Bob Huber: Local columnist You can’t buy bitters anymore. They were all the rage during the Civil War, but their popularity petered out. You see, armies of the North were to a large extent financed by a special wartime tax on booze, and so bitters were born. Bitters were an alleged medicine containing alcohol, […]

Gift to mom taking kids to drive-in

By Bob Huber: Local columnist Mother’s Day always reminds me of a time when I supported a family, a dog pack, an ancient Ford, a cigar addiction and the federal government on $400 a month. In those days I put all our bills in a hat each month and drew one out to pay. If […]

‘Someday’ comes in form of dream car

By Leonard Pitts: Syndicated columnist The car glides to a stop in front of the hotel. Light splashes off gleaming black metal as the valet gets out. He hands the keys to my wife. Marilyn says, “These aren’t my keys.” The valet says, “Yes, they are.” Marilyn says, a little more forcefully, “These aren’t my […]

Motorbikes not for later years of life

By Bob Huber: Local columnist Just when I was beginning to enjoy my twilight years, our youngest offspring ran out of money in her quest for a Guinness record for years in college. Her husband, once removed, pressured me into tiding them over by temporarily buying his overpriced motorcycle — a Kamikaze 500 or something […]

Sometimes camping stinks

By Bob Huber: Local columnist When spring rears its ugly head in these dusty parts, I always get claustrophobia — a fear of being trapped in a 1957 Chevy with a polecat. I caught that terminal ailment when our kids were small, and our family drove through a rain storm. What happened was, we went […]

Holiday haunts boonies

Bob Huber: Local Columnist Let’s take a look at Sasquatch in New Mexico, because October is Halloween Month. And that’s just the tip of the frightberg. Ghostly sounds can be heard, such as owls hooting, bones rattling, trees swaying and slurping water like vampires. To make matters worse, whenever Halloween rears it monstrous head, up […]

Horror created by mice

By Bob Huber: CNJ columnist Throughout my longtime marriage to Marilyn, she often asked, “Why do these things happen to us? Why? Why?” I always replied with a shrug, because I didn’t know. (Secretly I thought our adventures probably happened to everyone, but they just didn’t talk about them. I wanted to mutter, “We’re just […]

Dogs, kids, drive-ins not good mix

By Bob Huber: Local Columnist When I was bringing home $90 a week to feed a family of five, I experienced an illuminating event in my life. It should be noted that I also supported a pack of five dogs, a cigar addiction, and an ancient Chevrolet that came over on the Mayflower. If anyone […]

Snakes more pressing issue than retirement

By Bob Huber: Local Columnist Is Social Security safe? We’re told that unless meaningful reform is implemented, the system will be bankrupt by the year 2050, which will plunge us into chaos, despair, and extreme whining. I don’t care, because I plan to be dead by then. So let’s forget about THAT problem. Instead, on […]

Speaking of pathetic: A wrong-dog story

By Bob Huber: CNJ columnist When we lived in the boondocks outside Santa Fe, I woke one morning to the sound of a whining dog. That wasn’t unusual, because we had half a dozen semi-literate canines at the time, stray animals that showed up each day for breakfast. But I peered out the window anyway […]