Birds of prey exhibit to come to Clovis

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Courtesy photo The bald eagle is one of eight species of birds coming to Clovis with the American Eagle Foundation’s Save Our American Raptors program. By Liliana Castillo: CNJ staff writer Clovis residents will get a chance to learn about America’s birds of prey up close. They’ll even have an opportunity to see the birds […]

Jan. 2, 2009

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? Enjoy part three of our annual look back at things that made us laugh in 2008. • SEPTEMBER – Beverly Hills residents suffered more coyote attacks on their pets Monday. The coyotes deploy females in heat to lure dogs outside, then devour them. In their own defense the coyotes […]

Jan. 1, 2009

HOLLYWOOD–Happy New Year, and how’s everybody? Enjoy part two of our three-part look back at things that made us laugh in 2008. • MAY -

Dec. 31, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? It’s time for our annual look back at the year in jokes. Here’s part one, come back tomorrow and Friday for parts two and three. • JANUARY – President Bush proposed tax rebates Friday to hold up a sinking U.S. economy. It wasn’t all bad news. For years President […]

Dec. 30, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • Barack Obama was voted the Most Admired Man in America Friday and Hillary Clinton was named Most Admired Woman, however Sarah Palin finished right behind them. It sums up the nation’s current mood. If hope and forgiveness don’t work, get the gun. • New England Patriots star Tom […]

Dec. 29, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • Valkyrie opened Friday about a German war hero who tried to kill Hitler. Close calls were the week’s theme. Hitler survived a suitcase bomb, Nixon survived an interview with Frost, and George W. Bush survived two attempts on his life by Florsheim. • The New York Times reports […]

Dec. 28, 2008

BEVERLY HILLS–Merry Christmas, everybody, and God bless America. • The Detroit Lions take the field today with the chance to become the first NFL team in history to lose all sixteen of their games. Talk about overpaid. The only people in Detroit who had a lousier year and made more money were the auto executives. […]

Dec. 26, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • President Bush issued 19 pardons Tuesday, forgiving drug dealers and embezzlers and counterfeiters and people who lied to the Department of Housing. That wasn’t the worst of it. He also gave them a $700 billion bailout. • Vladimir Putin’s shirtless photo defeated Barack Obama’s shirtless photo in an […]

Dec. 25, 2008

BEVERLY HILLS–Merry Christmas, everybody, and God bless America. • Barack Obama strolled the beaches in Hawaii on his vacation Tuesday. He didn’t have a chance to miss Chicago. He wasn’t in Honolulu for two days when Governor Rod Blagojevich tried to sell his beach chair to Jesse Jackson Jr. for $1 million. • The Baydan […]

Dec. 14, 2008 Library Books

The following books are available for checkout at the Clovis-Carver Public Library: Vineyard Chill by Philip Craig reveals the darker side of the off-season at one of America’s most illustrious vacation destinations as J.W. Jackson summons all his investigative skills to rescue two friends in trouble. The Cure Within: A History of Mind-body Medicine by […]

New Deal didn’t spark economy

By Tibor Machan: Freedom New Mexico columnist If President-elect Barack Obama is serious about admiring President Franklin Delano Roosevelt for how the latter dealt with America’s Great Depression, then America and the world may be in for some very ugly times. By the most reliable historical accounts, FDR did not overcome the economic crisis of […]

Dec. 10, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • The White House announced Thursday that President Bush has purchased a home in the Dallas suburb of Preston Hollow. The president must have paid cash for the house. Would you give a home loan to a guy with a trillion dollar deficit and no job? • Caroline Kennedy […]

Dec. 9, 2007

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • Caroline Kennedy asked the governor of New York Thursday to appoint her to the U.S. Senate seat that’s being vacated by Hillary Clinton. The pattern’s clear. The U.S. Senate is now a day care center for the female relatives of legendary sex addicts. • President Bush went to […]

Dec. 8, 2007

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • The Big Three automakers asked Congress for a federal bailout Friday at the exact moment O.J. Simpson begged a Nevada judge for mercy. What did you expect? O.J. Simpson was the last guy to buy a Ford Bronco and it didn’t turn out well for either of them. […]

Dec. 7, 2008

BEVERLY HILLS–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • Laura Bush presided over the White House Christmas tree lighting ceremony last week on the South Lawn. The ceremony was especially moving this year. The Nativity Scene depicts Three Wise Men from Detroit asking the Baby Jesus for his first miracle. • President Bush bought a large […]

National show to feature fugitive

CNJ Staff Local fugitive Noe Torres will be featured Saturday on the Fox television show America’s Most Wanted. Show Producer Jenna Naranjo said the segment will focus the 29-year-old homicide suspect and his attempts to negotiate a surrender. It will be the second time an AMW segment has featured Torres and the fourth episode this […]

Dec. 5, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • Plaxico Burress was wounded when his gun accidentally went off in his waistband in a nightclub Sunday. He claimed he was carrying it to protect his jewelry. If he really wanted to protect the family jewels, he was an idiot to put a gun in his pants. • […]

Dec. 4, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • New York Giants star Plaxico Burress was arrested Monday for carrying an unlicensed gun in a nightclub. He shot himself in the leg to keep from spilling his drink. He lost a lot of blood but luckily John Daly was a perfect match for a blood transfusion. • […]

Dec. 3, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • The Oklahoma Sooners passed Texas in the BCS Sunday for the chance to play the Alabama-Florida winner for the national title. It’s an obsession. It could be the middle of January before the entire South realizes we just elected a black president. • NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell expressed […]

Dec. 2, 2008

HOLLYWOOD–God bless America, and how’s everybody? • John Daly teed off in the Australian Open Thursday. He said his alcohol demons have been cured by stem cell treatment. Billy Graham has given up giving personal interventions like he did with George W. Bush and now he’s just mailing his hair to everyone. • Thanksgiving Day […]